I suffer from an eating disorder
And I don’t ever talk about it
Mostly because I do eat
I love food
I love all food
I binge eat in fact, often times
And normally I eat well and healthy
But I have self punishment mechanisms
I’ve only just recently admitted to
And I struggle to convince myself to self love
I don’t eat when I’m mad at myself
When I have un-forgiveness or anxiety
Sometimes I’m just nauseous and can’t
It’s a purging too, not always a punishment
Sometimes fasting helps me feel better
It’s humbling and grounding in a way
A tearing down, for a building back up
I’m trying to heal and be better
For myself, yes, but for my family, my sons
I am praying more, for Grace and guidance
We all suffer from deep depression
And self sabotage in one way or another
I also suffer from a sleeping disorder
From a childhood full of trauma
And a life living in addiction and sin
It’s not a glamorous thing, the truth
We all need help yet hide in shame
I’m learning though that in my weaknesses
Is where He is strong, my God
Thank you for Jesus, my Salvation
Come break bread with me, Brothers & Sisters
Come and let us eat