Sometimes when I say, “I’m not feeling well”

It’s cause my heart begins racing with a single memory

It’s cause my blood pressure is spiking, my hands start to shake

It’s cause my soul is beginning to crush all over again

It’s cause I can feel the tears instantly emerge at the near breaking point

It’s cause I know once I start crying again I won’t be able to stop

It’s cause the last time I cried for 3 days and couldn’t open my puffy eyes for 3 more

It’s cause I get light headed and have trouble breathing when anxiety attacks

It’s cause I miss my best friend and waves of grief come unexpectedly to drown me

When I say, “I’m not feeling so well” and you outreach no hand to help me

It’s cause you think I mean a tummy ache, and surely, I am fine

And you’re right – I’m fine, everything’s fine, I’ll be okay – I’m just not feeling so well.